The Quest for an Ugly Christmas Sweater

Ugly Christmas sweaters are hard to find. Okay, let me qualify that. They are harder to find than I thought they would be, especially for the price I was willing to pay ($5 or less).

I went to my nearest Goodwill and browsed the Christmas sweater section (yes, there really was an entire section of Christmas sweaters, vests, t-shirts and sweatshirts). I’m just not willing to pay $7.99 for something I’m only going to wear once a year, especially when it’s Santa and his reindeer, or a cat decked out with holiday cheer. Granted, some of those sweaters were really, really ugly. But I just couldn’t convince myself that any were worth any money at all. However, the ugly sweater Christmas party was happening, with or without me, and I didn’t want to show up to my work party without one.

So I made my own.

I'm making my own ugly Christmas sweater. #diy #uglysweater #thankyoudollarstore

A post shared by Mari Cheney (@hazzeltoz) on

A white sweater had recently developed a hole in the shoulder and I was going to throw it away. But why would I throw it away when I could wrap garland to hide the hole? I found decorations at the $1 section of Target and used super glue and tape to affix the decorations to the sweater. This is the one time in my life I wished I owned a hot glue gun. I also bought some candy cane stickers and added them to the masterpiece.

Christmas threw up! #uglysweater #uglysweaterpdx

A post shared by Mari Cheney (@hazzeltoz) on

I call it “Christmas threw up.”

Now we shall see if the decorations stay on the sweater when I put it on tomorrow. I’ve enlisted a coworker to follow me around to be on decoration patrol should something fall off.

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